Tuesday, November 30, 2010

I got off at the metro station, climbed up the stairs, taking them two at a time and then, for the next 10 minutes waited for him to come. It was all going exactly as planned...

If you had asked my parents where i was on the 25th of November you would have gotten a rather proud 'He was at his friends house preparing for a competition' in reply. The truth, however, as it often was, was the diametric opposite to this. I, until recently had been taking full advantage of the trust abbu ammi had on me. However, as it often is, when you take something for granted, it disappears. Things were to change soon and it wasnt going to be at all pretty.

The sun shone bright, melting away any traces of guilt i had left within me, along with it. For the first time this winter, i could notice my breath in the air as i inhaled in. The usual hustle bustle of morning travelers surrounded me as i stood there, avoiding the thousand eyes that gazed at me.

After an agonizing 10 minutes, he arrived, dressed in a blue sweatshirt and dark blue denims, with a bag hung around his neck with his school uniform inside.

'Mene station pe change kar lia tha' he said as he greeted me with a handshake and an almost shameless smile.

The bell in the school nearby rung, signalling the the start of the school day. On an usual day, i would be sitting in class, with a newspaper in one hand and a sandwich in another. Today, i found myself,in a dark avenue, right behind the metro station, where we were hiding ourselves from Bluebellian eyes. We made our way to the next door market where we were to meet with 4 others.

After a few packets of chips, and a few boxes of something else, hairy potter with his jadoo, chole bathure for breakfast and a frankie each for lunch we made our way back home. On my return, I was bombarded with questions. My mom knew something was amiss.  Yet, she, having full faith in me, refused to show me any signs, and as she spoke, there wasnt even the slightest tone of suspicion.

'How was the movie?' She said, as she opened the door.

A smile appeared on her face as the one on mine disappeared.

'Mummy, i had gone to my friends to do a project and i might have to go tomorrow too!' I replied, keeping in mind the possibility of us going again tomorrow.

The rest of the day was rather uneventful. Most of it spent in the darkness of my room, leaving it only at times to go to the kitchen in the hunt for something to eat. I was extremely pleased with my achievements of the day! MY FIRST SCHOOL BUNK :D i thought. And if things went as was planned, the first of many to come.

Morning next, i was in my school uniform, sitting in my class, reading the paper. Half the day passed and not a word about the previous day was said. Everything was surprisingly normal! Like i had never been gone...

'I dont get it, if you wanted to have some clean fun, why couldn't you have gone after school?' She looked straight at me as she spoke and I, ashamed, look straight at the laminated floor. This was it, the hunter had caught his prey, i had run out of luck.

I looked up, searching for an answer but found myself going through her vast collection of books instead. A yellow paperback copy with Bob Dylan inscribed on it in bold black letters caught my eye. I opened my mouth and closed it again, unable to find the words to describe what i really felt.

Bhenchod chutiyagayi hein kya?  BHENCHOD ZYAADA BAKWAS MAT KAR! I thought as she went on..

'Yes tell me child? What was the need to bunk?' She sat in her leather chair signing papers and occasionally looked up at me as she spoke. Moments passed, I still hadnt said anything. This was clearly irritating her.

'I'm sorry maam, i didnt know what i was doing and i came under...'

'Peer pressure? Who's peer pressure did you come under?'

Kya bhenchod. Ek tho bol raha hun, aur bolne bhi nahi de rahi. Chutiyagayi hein aur saat mein saatya bhi gayi.

'Sorry maam, what i'm trying to say is i got carried away, it shouldnt have happened and i promise you it will never happen again. I made a mistake, sorry!'  I said, still staring at the Bob Dylan book half wanting to ask her if i could borrow it.

'I still dont get it though, why did you have to bunk?'


'I'm sorry maam. i just wanted to experience bunking, i've done it now and i promise you it wont happen again.'

She was a bit taken aback by this. Still signing papers and dialing digits on her phone frantically she looked me in the eyes, here face still calm as ever, her hair, like it always does, resembling a birds nest held into place with over-sized sunglasses and her reading classed slowly climbing down her nose.

'Was this your first time?'

'Yes maam, it will never happen again, i'm sorry' I said, finally realizing the gravity  of the situation. This was my only chance to save myself from suspension and i wasn't going to let it fly by.

She looked at me again..

'Did you drink or do something you shouldnt have?'

'No maam, i swear i didnt do anything i shouldnt have, i went to watch harry potter with a few friends and went straight back home.'

There was silence and i knew better than to open my mouth again. She put the bunch of papers aside, put her pen down and shuffled around in her chair. What seemed like hours passed. Silence prevailed still. I recited a silent prayer to God above, knowing it was only he who could save me.

'Okay, I'm trusting you and i'm letting you off with a warning.' She was sitting back in her chair now, still in deep thought, which i decided to interrupt, making sure she didnt change her mind.

I broke into a smile. I wanted to jump, higher than I ever had, I wanted to go hug her and say thank you, I wanted to scream bhenchod, louder than i ever had before, I WANTED to do oh so many things. And yet, i managed a 'Thank you maam, i assure you it will never happen again!'

As i left the room, a Yeah, i hope it doesnt, followed me from behind.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Redirecting. Blah Blah Blah.

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Right so, she had a long name. And a bit of a funny surname. but it had always been that way with me, it was like newtons law of gravitation, but it was applicable to names for me. The longer and weirder the name, the greater the force of attraction i experienced.
As i sat there, going through whatever pictures of her i could find, again and again and again, i was interrupted, by a noise, which by now, seemed all too familiar...

'Ahmar beta, padna nahi hein kya? IIT, facebook pe bethe bethe nahi pahauch jaoge.'

And again.

'Ahmar! Jao, pad lo!'

There is a reason why i call it a noise. It was incessant, loud and irritating. but, that was the thing with my mom, she was like an alarm clock, except a lot more stubborn. She wouldlt stop beeping until i woke up. Unfortunately, she didnt come along with a snooze button, and she being my mother, i coundnt grab her and throw her so that i could no more hear her, or better still hit her against the table till she broke.

Log out.

I got my lazy ass off the sofa and put it on my chair. Opened my physics book, and started reading.

Though, only to find her name, in every word of that book. Unfortunately, physics has more figures than words. And figures + her name = Not very pretty. And so, my mind wandered off. Into a world of its own,  after a trip to the woods, and also to other places, (the details of which i must not unveil otherwise i shall be slapped across the face by all of you) i returned back to reality.

The thing with reality is, its sucky. Worse than sucky actually. Its a bit gay, could be impotent too. Not sure though. basically, it is everything bad and more in this world.

I did not even know this girl. And she, unless she had been stalking my profile like i had been stalking hers, did not even know i existed. Yet, i could not stop thinking, about her, and about how things would be when we started dating and then when we got married, and whether we would fight a lot or no and how many kids we would have and what we would name them. Actually, i kinda got stuck on the having kids thing. I'm a bit horny that way, but hey, i'm 17 now, and i have a couple of hairs sticking out of chin and a faint moustache too. And i had proper sideburns also, until i SHAVED them off. So, since i was a man now, this was, but normal.

That evening, i logged in again, went through my notifications, friend requests, messages. Well, honestly, i had only 2 notifications. And that too about somebody who had posted questions like 'do you think ahmar is cute?' and 'would you ever go out with ahmar?'. The answers to both these questions, for any straight girl and any not so straight boy was obviously yes. Okay, maybe not. but i was prettaay popular with girls back in the day.

I had just learned to walk, and i had a clean shaven head, which, if inclined at the right angle could reflect the sunlight. Not to mention, i could talk, and that too in english.  I think it was a combination of all of these, that made all the girls my age, drool all over me and me, wet myself.

Anyway, i soon found myself on her profile. What a beauty she was. Her hair fell right into place, without her even having to try, in every one of the 5 pictures i had access too. Her smile, well, it made me smile. And her eyes, were fucking pretty. Heck, even her nose was beautiful.

I decided to add her as a friend. Well aware, she had no idea who i was, but i reasoned that when she read my name on her list of firend requests she would atleast get to know, that ahmar suhail was somebody.

The next morning, the first thing i did was to go online and see if she had accepted my request.
No response.
2 days, 3 days, 4, 5, 6. Days came, and they went.

Its been 4 months now. And my homepage tells me that she has become friends with other people from time to time. I have stopped caring now, but i still end up on her profile sometimes. She still has the same 5 pictures she had then, and i still havent gotten bored of going through them, like i hadnt then.

Mirror mirror on the wall, who is coolest and sexiest of them all?
Yes, its me.